Podcast: Wailing On These Hoes

Thursday, October 6, 2011

"She's Like Gandhi With Amazing Tits!!!" (Side B)

If any of you read my last post you probably feel the same way about it that I do--it left MUCH to be desired. I searched my soul real deep and then I realized what my most recent Wail lacked--THE OVERWHELMING POWER OF THE PUSSY!

Yes! The pussy is strong! And when faced with the indomitable power of pussy, men breakdown like stress in a stainless steel grinder. The presence of Amber Rose's pussy was far too overwhelming for Peter Rosenberg's glaring criticisms to stand up to and he went SOFT. (Pun almost, kinda, most definitely intended.) For this much I applaud Miss Amber Rose. Why rant and rave when you can sit back and let your transgressors fall prey to your irresistible feminine charms? Why waste energy with battle when you can (with minimal effort on your part) persuade your opponents to helplessly submit to your will? Does the matador charge into the ring just like the bull or does he outwit the beast (after it has been weakened by severe blood loss of course)?

Men are at a severe disadvantage when it comes to women like Amber Rose. Sure a man can talk plenty good shit behind a woman's back (usually because he can't have her or he had her now he wishes to contradict whatever psychologically debilitating effects her pussy has had on his fragile male ego) but when that scorned woman, now standing directly in front of that once discerning male, bats her eyelashes, smiles real sweet, homey sheds all his sense of principle. "Wow! She cares about, like, humanity and stuff. She's so real..." All of a sudden Amber Rose wins the award for most remarkable and impressive woman in the world and is acquitted of all prior accusations of fucking her way to an unafforded status of celebrity. (That gentle purr in her voice didn't hurt her case either.) Amber Rose had pussy oozing from her every word and Rosenberg lapped up every sweet, sticky drop of seduction that fell from her lips.

As an objective listener I like to see any situation from all sides and I feel it is my duty to address whatever interpretations may come. So maybe Amber Rose WAS objectified. Maybe she was belittled. She was very possibly even degraded but ask Amber Rose and she might have something different to say...

Therefore Miss Amber Rose, I'll repeat, I ain't mad at cha. If sex is your weapon of choice, fire at will, maw and don't miss. I can dig it.

WHEW! I feel SO much better... how 'bout y'all?

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